“Everyone knows that peace has to begin with oneself, but not many people know how to do it.” -Thich Nhat Hanh
“Learning takes place only in a mind that is innocent and vulnerable.”—Krishnamurti
Recognizing the Roots of Internalized Oppression
I became an educator for many reasons, one of which was to help dismantle systems of privilege and power by addressing them within my courses, by teaching about my family history, and by doing what I could as a leader to ensure we made our school equitable and inclusive of all students and adults. It wasn’t until I developed a mindfulness practice, however, that I realized that dismantling systems of oppression first needs to start with me.
Despite the stories I was raised with, the classes I teach, and my career’s worth of work related to equity and social justice, there is so much within me that is still conditioned to uphold the systems of dominance in our society, particularly as a white person. While I certainly understand what it means to be marginalized because of my gender, religion, and sexual orientation, my whiteness is the access card to systemic benefits and acceptance—which is all the more reason it needs to be examined, uprooted, altered. In equal measure, I need to examine the ways I feel marginalized and undo the tropes that have held me back from being fully embodied. After all, we can’t serve our students or our colleagues if we don’t love ourselves as we are, if we don’t recognize and accept differences as strengths, if we don’t disrupt unconscious destructive patterns, and if we don’t strive to change the world through empathy and compassion.
Mindfulness as a Revolutionary Act
The research is clear about the neurological benefits of mindfulness meditation, and the research also indicates that practicing mindfulness at regular intervals can alter the brain. From present-day brain research to centuries-old meditation traditions the world over, we know that taking the time to turn inward and to inquire into our conscious and unconscious beliefs is the beginning of making change towards what’s possible: that our brains can develop new connections when we begin to actively habituate ourselves to new ways of seeing, thinking, believing, and acting.
Earlier this school year, a colleague and I facilitated a workshop called “Whiteness as an Evolutionary Act.” We offered tools that allowed participants to examine internalized forms of white supremacy and interrupt deeply rooted patterns and reactions when encountering difference: to choose a new response when situations of difference arise. We led participants through a guided meditation, asking people to recall a time in their past when race came up for them. We asked participants to notice the quality of their breathing; the sensations in their bodies; the emotions that came up; and the thoughts they were having—all with nonjudgmental awareness. When people “woke up” from the meditation, they reflected in writing and then talked about their experiences. The discussion was powerful and generated some of the most meaningful work in that session.
Change Ourselves, Change the World
This meditation process (see below or click here to download a copy) is just one way to examine how systems live within us, and this practice is based on the Four Foundations of Mindfulness from the Buddhist tradition. If practiced daily for about 10-20 minutes, this meditation can ultimately change how we look at our internal conditioning, untangle the roots of oppression we have been taught to believe/enact, and build more empathy towards ourselves and others. Eventually, our responses to difference become more immediate. We can be more present, get curious rather than reactive/defensive, and be more responsive to meeting situations in front of us with compassion. For ourselves, our colleagues, and our students, this practice is worth the commitment.
As educators, we’re all on the same team in service of young people, in service of providing a better world for future generations. Mindfulness is that step towards doing right by our students, our colleagues, our school, and our society by changing the world as it is to world that’s possible.
Self-Guided Meditation for Investigating Internalized Systems of Oppression
Part I: Set Conditions: You’ll need a quiet space to sit, a notebook and pen (or any other note-taking device), and if you prefer, a timer of some sort. There are a range of meditation apps available, and one I like to use is Insight Timer. Or, you can just engage in the practice in a timeframe that feels most comfortable for you at first (though I do recommend spending at least 10 minutes a day).
Make sure to find a quiet place to sit with no distractions. This could mean cross-legged on the floor, on a meditation pillow, or on a chair. If sitting on a chair, make sure to place your feet on the floor (for grounding purposes) and place your hands palms up or palms down on your thighs.
Part II: Start the timer and take your time to fully contemplate the prompt: Close your eyes or fix your gaze on one spot on the floor in front of you; this act allows you to be still. Recall an experience related to race (or class, gender identity, sexual orientation, religion, ability, etc.). Challenge yourself to consider something that may cause you some discomfort based on your direct experience or what you might have been taught to believe. This should be a moment that has had a significant impact on you. Bring yourself as much into that memory as you feel able.
The meditation:
- Notice the breath: With no judgment, pay attention to the breath. Does it feel the same? Different? Is it fast or slow? What do you notice about your breath in this moment? Sometimes, it helps to put a hand on your belly or chest to notice your breathing.
- Scan the body: As you recall this memory, now turn your attention toward the body. Do you feel sensations of any sort (e.g. tension, tingles, heat)? How do those sensations feel? Are they pleasant, unpleasant, neutral? Our bodies often store our memories much like our brains, and feeling into these sensations allows a person to be more present with what’s happening.
- Identify emotions: Our emotions are connected to our physical sensations, and this part of the meditation can be the most sensitive and tender. Staying non-judgmental, recall any emotions associated with this memory (sadness, shame, embarrassment, fear). Noticing these emotions, letting them be there, and getting curious about them allows us to soften towards them—and ultimately, ourselves.
- Pay attention to thoughts: When recalling uncomfortable memories, our minds often begin racing. It’s easy to attach to a thought and go down a rabbit hole of storytelling. As best as you can, watch your thoughts as if you were watching a tv show and flipping through channels. Rather than latching onto each thought, simply label it and let it pass. These thoughts are often connected to our beliefs and values, and like emotions, painful insights can arise. Compassion towards one’s self is most important at this moment, as we often can be our toughest critics.
Part III: Reflect through writing: After completing the meditation, take five minutes to write freely about what came up for you. Maybe you were focused on sensations the body. Maybe some strong emotions came up. Maybe thoughts arose that gave you new insight. Similar to meditation, staying non-judgmental and curious as you write allows you to be authentic in the moment. There’s no “right way” to meditate, and each day is different, so let your ideas flow without editing them. This act is oftentimes the most powerful.
Author’s Bio:
Lori Cohen is an experienced school leader, instructional coach, classroom teacher, and education consultant who has worked in public and independent schools for two decades; she cares deeply about educating for equity and believes coaching serves as the best form of professional development for teachers and leaders.